Tuesday, November 30, 2010

The disadvantages of the internet

There are four main reasons for using the Internet abuses. First, the Internet can endanger human by the wave of the computer harmful to health. When people focus on the Internet, they will forget their daily life should be, by not eat well, sleep well. Secondly, it also affects the communication between families and the distance to be a gap. They prefer to chat with friends in the Internet more than face to face communication with family. Additional, our personal information on the Internet is not secure. When our carelessness, our personal data and information can easily be stolen by Internet hackers. Finally, some harmful Internet content, not suitable for us to watch, especially young people. Such as violence, pornography and etc.

2 comments:

  1. Mary,
    I hope I can improve more,hope you can guide me, especially in my writing skill.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Wong

    This is a very well structured paragraph, and you have made excellent points.

    There are several very well written sentences:
    'They prefer to chat with friends on the Internet than face to face communication with family.
    Our personal information on the Internet is not secure.'

    I'd like to rewrite the last two sentences:

    Finally, some harmful Internet content, such as violence, pornography etc, is not suitable for us to watch, especially young people.

    Additonal is not correct - use 'In additon, or Additionally'.

    Keep writing Wong. I think you have a lot of great ideas to share. You seem to understand the topic well.

    See you on Monday.

    Mary

    ReplyDelete